Alice and I were puttering around Whole Foods tonight, foraging for dinner, when I came across the “make your own 6-pack” cooler. I was kind of excited, because…well, beer! I grabbed 6 that had
excellent credentials cool labels.
Before we begin, let it be known that I know absolutely nothing about beer. I know that if I buy beer it is PBR. Not because I enjoy it, but because it is the cheapest option above malt liquor. The thought of spending $40 on a six-pack is kind of offensive to me. I really don’t care that every hop was hand-picked by organic gnomes. Beer should be like bread. Affordable.
Smooth Ryed Ale – Bridgeport Brewing
Portland Oregon 6.3% Alc by Vol.
Upon opening the ale Alice thought that it smelled like pine needles and oranges. I thought it smelled like beer. I poured it into my favorite Guinness glass and noticed its rich…beer color. It didn’t seem to have much carbonation as the small head dissipated quickly. Upon first sip I was immediately hit with a sweetness that was quickly overtaken by a bitterness that I can only assume is rye. I am, on the whole, unfamiliar with rye. Alice just stuck out her tongue in dislike. I am going to side with Al on this one. The burps smell pretty bad too, according to my wife.
Verdict: Two tongues stuck out.
Apocalypse IPA – 10 Barrel Brewing Co.
Bend Oregon 6.8% Alc by Vol.
Alice yelled “Apricots!” when she first smelled this, I thought it smelled like a bag of weed. She thought it tasted like apricots, I will stand by my original statement and say that it tasted like weed. Which, surprisingly, is a really good thing! This one had a bitterness that instead of being offensive, was strangely comforting. Like a ratty old blanket.
[EDITORS NOTE: Paul has never even seen “weed” he just doesn’t know what apricots smell like]
Inversion IPA – Deschutes Brewery
Bend, Oregon 6.8% Alc by Vol.
I’m already two beers in. I don’t really know what to say about this one. I think I used up my limited beer vocabulary. Alice thinks it tastes like Anchor Steam. I think it is kind of chocolatey with a nice hoppy finish. This may well be my favorite beer of the evening. I don’t know. I kinda feel like playing metal really loud and yelling at people on facebook. For the sake of a fair and just review I will now officially be breaking it into two parts.
Please join us tomorrow for round two.